A Big Poo Chat Hello!

My name is Bertram Bum-Roberts, I'm 76 years old, I have 3 wives and 35 children - however, I'm not a bigamist! I will explain all in due course.

I live, for most of the year, in my country home Bum-Roberts Manor and spend the rest of the year travelling the world and history chatting to my many friends and acquaintances, the majority of whom I hope you might have more than a passing interest in.

In this "blog" I intend to pass on some of the more interesting and exciting anecdotes, interviews and stories I have collected during my travels. Some I will write myself others will be in the form of correspondents from "special guest" contributors, and I can assure you that these will be the jewels in the Poo Chat crown.

So, I hear you cry, how does Bertram travel so widely? So historically? Well, you silly sods, the answer is surprisingly simple... I have a magical chair! My chair may not be exiting or extravagant in appearance (for it is my old, seemingly ordinary, school chair and desk), but its extra-ordinary powers more than make up for this. I discovered the remarkable furniture on my very first day at school in 1891.
"But you're only 76" you cry! You forget, dear reader, that I have a magical chair. Where have you been for the last 244 words?

Are you beginning to fathom how it is possible for one having multiple-simultaneous wives? That's correct. My chair is my saviour, and I believe over the coming weeks, months and years you will glean some benefit from it too. In fact I would be positively envious of the amazing writing you will be able to devour from these pages, were I not already one step ahead. Believe me, an old man with 3 wives will pale in comparison with the stories you will be told.

Just to whet your appetite, here is an extract from a journal contribution made by a teenaged David Cameron:

It had been one hell of an afternoon! My school robes were in tatters, the palms of my hands raw from all the rubbing, the strange smell still lingered, I could barely catch my breath, but I couldn't have been happier! I rolled over the wet grass (my legs were still trembling so badly that walking was impossible), over and over I went, and then, suddenly, I found him... Jasper!

And that's just the tip of the ice berg! The forming queue of contributors is quite flabbergasting: Tony Robinson, Ray Mears, Winston Churchill, Ray Charles (and his son Craig), Jensen Button, Ben Fogle, Queen Boudicca, Nigella Lawson, Trevor McDonald and Sandy Toksvig, to name but a few!

Unbelievable isn't it? Subscribe any way you like (bookmark, RSS/Atom or via email) see the links below and to the right.

See you soon

Bertram